Exercise Archives - PANDAS Foundation UK

When Reality Doesn’t Match Dreams – My Post Natal Depression Story

My name is Nikki. My children are now 9 and 6 but I remember so clearly my less than romantic introduction to motherhood I had.

We had been trying for a baby for 18 months before we had some tests done. I know many people who try for years buy 18 months seemed like a lifetime when I was so desperate to conceive. I remember going in to town one day and seeing a very young girl hanging out with her mates smoking and drinking whilst heavily pregnant. I came home balling my eyes out on more than one occasion. Every month hoping for a positive pregnancy test.

On Christmas eve 2005 my husband proposed and I threw myself in to arranging the wedding to take my mind off wanting a baby so much.  I have POCO’s and my husband had been crushed 13 foot underground just months before we met and suffered severe damage in his hips and pelvis. We knew the chances of conception were going to be less. It came back that we my husband had less than 17% live sperm and 10% of those were deformed. We decided we didn’t want to try IVF but that if nothing happen we would adopt in the future. Read More

PROJECT ME: PART TWO BY HANNAH TUBB

Foundations and marathons

I re read my last post. It sounds so urgent, desperate and floundering! But that’s how I was feeling – after I’d written that post my mood changed, I felt like a weight had been lifted – I had acknowledged how I was feeling and identified what I needed to do to change that!
The next step was the list.  I have priorities and responsibilities – these are the things that I’m most likely to resist because I HAVE to do them. I very rarely let myself enjoy them and see them as chores. Work is one of these things and I’m ashamed to say that my family feels like a chore sometimes as well – writing those words down is hard because I don’t want them to be true. I want it to come easy to me like it seems to do for so many others.
Therefore, my first step had to be acceptance – accept the job I have and be grateful, except my role as a mother and stop beating my self up for what I’m NOT giving the girls and focus on what I AM already giving them. Read More

CAN I FEEL GOOD NOW…? – CATHERINE PANDAS

I felt a bit odd writing this on Monday after binging on Michelin Star food at Arbutus and booze a plenty for my final blast of 30th birthday celebrations, so I’ve been mentally tracking things as this week has ticked by, and now I’m ready to write.

I’m getting married on 12th December. I’ve come through PND, a big fat break up, meeting the love of my life, dealing with ongoing mental health problems to end up here, squeezing into my size 16 clothes and enormous black comfy pants. Oh dear. As each Monday drifts by in a haze of “I definitely deserve this bottle of wine after today!” and “Darling, let’s treat ourselves to an Indian..” the pressure is kind of mounting now. The fact is, I don’t want to look like the Michelin Man on the school run, let alone on our Big Day SO it’s time to “cut the fat”.

I got gym membership for Christmas, which has been used intermittently as my energy came and went like the moon but the last two weeks I’ve been hitting it up like nobody’s business. It’s a shocker, but actually I feel f**king fantastic! Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a bit of a porker but I’m starting to feel definition in my muscles and my head feels clear. Focused. I feel indestructible. Read More

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